Growing

So how do you know when you are suppose to get out of a situation? Or maybe even a friendship? This weekend has put me into situations that I don't really like, but things that I have to deal with.

Saturday for instance was my Camp interview. Well I got up at nine and was so excited and I was just really ready to see how the day went! Well my friend had told me to call her in the morning when I woke up. Well so I did. I called and talked to her mom a few minutes, until her mom went to wake her up. And well she wasn't there. So her mom starts freaking out. And I'm just like I don't know what in the heck to do. So I just sit and wait, and pray. Because thats all I can do. Well then I started to go get ready, and during this whole time I was getting ready I was thinking about things. I've told this girl about God. I've been the "holy" example as some of you like to say. But sometimes it feels like I'm getting so close and then its like BAM Just kidding. And its so frustrating. And all day I couldn't stop thinking about how selfish she was to sneak out and run away for a day from her parents. I'm sure they just felt helpless. I know I did. Here I was at my house, getting ready to leave for my interview and My best friend is missing. I mean what do you do about that. But then I started thinking. Wow She called me and She KNEW I had my interview. Not only was she stressing her family out, She was putting strain on me. I'm not meaning to sound selfish but I would never do that to anyone. I don't know. I mean I put a lot into that friendship and sometimes it just feels like I'm getting nothing out of it. I mean shes my best friend and I love her dearly, but I don't know. Its pulling me down a bit too. And I know friends are there. But I can only push so much. Ya know?

And then there is some other things that are going on. I just don't get it. I'm being pushed out again. I hate this feeling. Because yet again, I feel like I'm on the outside looking in.

I guess I'm learning to grasp opportunities that are out there now. I'm learning that sometimes I need to think of myself first. I guess I just don't really know when to put others in front of me or not. Because I mean I want to. But sometimes it just feels like I need to give up.

When you feel as though you have outgrown something do you just stop participating? Or do you keep going and pretend to be happy?